"I don't Understand...What Did I Do?"

"I Don't Understand...What did I do?" - - Written By: Randa

"I try to stand still when he comes to me, but it's so hard. He pushes the halter up on my nose, and hooks it tightly. He then pulls on the rope hard, so I follow him closer, and then he yanks on the rope. What did I do wrong? Why is he so angry? What does he want me to do? I take a step back, and then he pulls on the rope again. I go closer to him, and again, he gets angry. I don't understnad what you want.
"When we reach the trailer, he ties me up tightly, I can't even move. I try to stand still as he runs the brush of my back and belly. Ouch, that hurt. I move away, and he slaps me, gets angry. I don't understand. When he brings the saddle out, he throws it on my back with a thud. I want to kick him, move away, but I don't dare, for I know what will happen if I do. He tightens the cinch tightly, and I hold my breath. Ouch, that pinches. I kick out, trying to get the pinching to stop. He yells at me, grabs the rope, and hits me with it.
"I then pull back against the rope, trying to get away. What did I do? Finally, when I knew there was no escape, I held still, trying not to twitch when I felt the sting of the rope. Finally, after every part of my body stung, he untied me, and shoved that metal piece in my mouth. I accepted it, hoping that I woudln't be beaten again. He shoves me ears forward, I too, tolerate it. I wait patiently until he steps up in the stirrup, and then I go, for if I wait until he is on my back, he will kick me hard.
"I go, and he jerks back on the reins, and hits my shoulders with them. I began tossing my head. I don't understand what he wants me to do. He kicks me to go forward, so when I go before he kicks me, he jerks back and I get beaten. I don't understand. What did I do? "When he finishes hitting, he gives me a good hard kick in the flanks. I take off at a full gallop, for that must be what he wants, kicking so hard. He leaned forward, causing me to stumble. How am I supposed to canter like this, with all of his weight on my shoulders. So, I kick up, hoping that it'll feel easier. Instantly, he pulled back on my mouth. I tossed my head, trying to get away from the pressure. He begins kicking me. I try to go forward, but he's pulling me back. What am I supposed to do? I don't understand.
"After the saddle is off, he ties me, and begins grooming me. Ouch, that's hard on my skin. I move away, hoping to get away from the pressure. I can feel him began to tense and get mad, but I feel him do that all the time. When he came back out of the barn, with the bull whip in his hand, I know what I'll be in for. The stinging begins over my body again. I toss my head, pull back, prance around, trying to get away in any way possible. He stops, and I stop. Maybe he's done. When he clipped the second rope to my halter, I knew he wasn't done. Now I have no where to go, and I have to stand still while the stinging continues. I don't understand. What did I do to deserve this?
"I tolerated this everyday. Everyday I got beaten, every day I got jerked on, and everyday he was angry. One day, I just couldn't take it anymore. He tied me up again, and got his bull whip. Before he reached me, I pulled back with all my might. It didn't hurt that badly. I pulled back harder and harder. He was running towards me now, yelling. I felt it loosen slowly, and I pulled back even harder until I was free! I spun around, kicked at him, knowing that I'd miss, and took off running. He could chase me all he wants to, but I am not coming back with him. I'm free!
"I ran through the day, that night, and the nexct day, until my legs began to feel weak, and I couldn't go on. I tried to push on, in fear that if I falter, he'll find me. I tried to push on, but I couldn't. I collasped on my side. I don't know how long I lay there in pain before I heard voices. No, please don't take me back to that place. I don't understand anything, and i get beaten. I'd rather die then go back there. The voices sound different, but I won't go back. I won't go back.
"I watched as a young girl came out of the trees. I felt her eyes on me, and I suddenly felt save, as though I was going to be okay. I gave one last sigh, laying me head on the cold grain. I know that my life is over, but at least I won't have to suffer anymore, and not understand what he wants. I'll be free....

A year Later...
"I watched as she approached the gate. I watched as her hand went into her pocket. Oh, I know what she has in there. I wiated until she reached the gate, looked up, and called me name. As soon as my name escaped her lips, I ran to the gate. I heard her sweet laugh in the air, and stopped in front of her, where she handed me a treat. I watched as she retreated into a shed, and came out with the halter and the stick that she loved me with.
"I approached her, and stood quietly as she placed the halter over my head. She rubbed me with it, spoke softly to me, and then tied it. She then rubbed her hands all over me, and then rubbed me with the stick. She then retreated, and I slowly walked behind her a ways, until she moved her finger towards her. Yes! I came running up to her, and she laughed. She put her arm around me, and together we walked around the corral. When she ran, I went beside her, when she stopped, I stopped.
"When we reached the barrels, she pionted her finger to it, and lifted the stick. Okay, I understand, you want me to go around the barrel. After I did this, we ran over to another barrel. She pionted her finger, until I was next to the barrel, when I felt the halter move slightly. I stoppped, and looked to her for the next sign of what she wants. I watched as she let her energy down. I looked around, breathed out, and began licking my lips. I understand this. I understand! I then watched as her energy came up. She tipped her head slightly, and began crossing her legs, flicking the string at the end of her stick at him. He knew exactly what she wanted, and began going over the barrel. He wanted to go over it, but he trusted his owner, so he put his faith and trust in her.

"When she removed his halter, he followed her everyway, ran when she did, backed up when she did, and when she lead him over to the fence, he obeyed willingly. When she climbed up on the fence, and settled down with ease on his back, he ddin't do anything. He loved the feeling of her sitting on his back, knowing that she was trusting him completely, and he trusted her completely. He move only when he felt her energy come up. He felt so lucky to have her now. He understood everything she asked, and he no longer didn't understand. For he has been saved, and is now having FUN!!"

It's amazing what Parelli Natural Horse Man Ship can do, huh? LOL. I kinda got this idea with my horse, Brizzee. He didn't beat her or anything, but as soon as he stepped into the stirrup, she went, and he pulled back on her...I just thought about that and looked through the horses eyes. So, what do you guys think?? This is kinda FUN!!

Oh, here's another one:

"Second Chance" - - By Randa.

"When you look into those big, brown eyes, with the long lashes staring at you, your heart reaches out to him. He is longing to be loved, cared for, and get the attention he needs. He deserves a second chance, he deserve to run naturally and free. As you stare deeply into those eyes, and his yours, a flash of bond, protectiveness, and hopefullness passes through you both. You may be his only hope, so you break down mentally.
"When you must leave, you feel him watching you, you hear him calling for you, and your heart melts in your chest. You're his only hope, can you really walk away? He's begging you to save him, to help him, to give him a happy, and natural life. You felt the bond when you stared into each other's souls, you felt his need, you felt the love pass through you, can you really just walk away?
"You want to save him in any way possible, but you just don't have the money. By the time you reach your vehicle, he's calling for you, running around, staring after you. You feel terrible, leaving him, knowing that you are his only chance, but what can you do? You drive away, and glance in the mirror every so often. Even after your out of site, you can feel him staring at you, and you can still feel that bond that spread between you and him.
"That night, he haunts her dreams. You wake up and all you can see are those big, dark brown eyes staring at you, begging you to save him. You can't sleep that night, you toss and turn, cry, and the next morning, you pick yourself up, trying to forget about him, and put him out of your mind. You keep yourself busy so you won't have to worry about him. You do some research on the internet, and you run across a video about horses that have been forgotten. "You break down as those dark brown eyes flash through your mind. You grab your care keys, the only money you have remaining, and you drive like an idiot until you reach the place. Even before you come into view, you can feel the hope spreading inside of him, and you can feel him watching you. Sure enough, as soon as you come over the hill, he's watching you, running around, nickering, for he knows that he has been saved. You have no money, don't know how you'll be able to buy hay, but you know if you don't spend what money you have to save him, he'll die, and can you live with yourself after that?
"You kill the engine, jump over the fence, wrap your arms around his neck, and bury your head into his blacke mane. He stays calm, absorbing the moment in, knowing that he'll get a lot more of it, for he knows that you have saved him. It'll be okay if you make mistakes, it'll be okay if you don't understand, because he'll be willing, patient, and he will try to teach you over and over again, until you understand him...you understand each other.
"You rub your hands lovingly over every inch of his body, and you wince when you can feel his bones beneath your hands, and every curve and piont of his ribs. But you keep moving your hands over every inch of his body; down his back bone, under his belly, down his legs, his tail, his rump, his head, ears, jaw, neck, everything. And when you look at his face, his eyes are closed, head is down, and he looks content. He's never had this kind of attention before. He will be as a patient as neccessary with you, because you have saved him. He'll let you lean on his shoulder, he'll let you get frustrated, until you understand.
"You pay for him, and call your friend to bring their horse trailer, as you can't leave him, in fear for if you leave, he may not be there when you come back. You stay beside him, rubbing him, giving him treats, letting him know that there is a better life ahead of him. No longer will he have to suffer. No longer will he go hungry, and have to stand still and quiet, as somebody is taking a bull whip, lashing it across his body. He wants to kick, but he doesn't, he tries to be patient. No longer will he have to watch every car that goes by, wishing that someone will stop and help him. No longer will he have to watch people walk away from him, and his heart trails after them. For now he has been saved. Now, he will run naturaly over the green pastures, run with other horses, and run to his human, for she will give him love, care for him, and rub her hands over his body just like she is doing now. He will have a second chance in life, he will be a horse again, and not just some "work" animal, that has no feelings, and doesn't care.
"A year later you step out of your house to hear him nickering at you. A smile touches your lips, and before you look up, you know he's standing there by the gate, waiting for you, watching for you. You move off the steps, and begin walking towards the corral. You make a few twists and turns, just to see if his eyes stay on your every move, and you aren't surprised when they do. You enter the pasture, and again, rub her hands lovingly over his body. You smile when you don't feel his ribs or bone, and instead you feel muscle, power, and fat. He is no longer a walking skelton that is about to die, he is a powerful, lively, spirited, and very beautiful horse. He is a great teacher, and has had never ending patience with you.You've made a few mistakes, maybe even hurt him once or twice on accident, but he forgives you, and stays patient. He is presistant with teaching you, until you finally understand. He is willing to be patient, and take however long it takes before you understand, for you have saved his life, and now, you have a great partnership.
"You laugh as he rubs against you, and takes off running across the green pasture, beneath the blue sky, and against the Eagle, racing beside him. You watch his every move, and laugh when he comes galloping up to you, only to do a slide stop in front of you, and look at you with those big, dark brown eyes that you fell in love with. You run your hands over his body, and when you are sure, you jump onto his back. He tosses his head, and when you are ready, he walks forward. He can feel that you trust him completely. This is different for him, not being "micromanaged", having a bit in his mouth, a saddle on, or even a halter. For you are riding him bareback and bridless, you are trusting him completely, and he can feel that.
"You give the slightest hints in your body of what you would like him to do, and he follows it immediately. And with your beautiful rescue horse, that was near death when you got him, you gallop over the green pasture, beneath the blue sky, towards the setting sun. His warm, and beautiful thick black mane whips into your face, and you become one with each other."

What do you guys think??
Savvy On,

~Randa~ & ~Brizzee~