Unconfident...

Wow! Sorry, I haven't been on here for a while. In about 3 hours it'll only be ONE day left!! YES!! I can't wait until Saturday!! I am so excited to see Twilight. I know, it's weird for a horse/country/mountain girl to be a Twilight girl as well, but oh well. I just wish that Stephenie Meyer will finish Midnight Sun all ready...I want to hear Edward's version. lol.

Okay, back to normal stuff: My mom hurt her ankle last Friday. I was playing a little with Brizzee, and that wasn't going to good. I misread her :''''( I thought she was Left Brain, and being Stubborn, so I pushed her a little bit, and we played, but we didn't really feel connected. I laid on the Pedestal, and let her graze. I realized she was unconfident with that too. I coudln't figure that one out. We were playing on the 22' foot line, I was just laying on the pedestal (which is a tire) staring at the sky, and she was eating, but she was eating quickly and tense. Maybe that made her nervous, I don't know.

So, we played a little bit. I thought we would just go back to "basics". Well, she didn't even do the Circling Game. When she wasn't bucking, pulling against me, she would just stop and stand there. ANd when I "drew" her towards me, she wouldn't come. I went back to spending undemaning time with her, and she was still acting fun. I thought it might just be because she feels good. So I thought; "Okay, I'll let her run around for a while, get all the "spunk" out." After I took the halter off, she stayed with me, and then moved away. She ran up and down the fence line, tense, with her head up, and tail high. I felt so bad!! She was unconfident that whole time, and I made it worse!! I've watched several different dvd's on horsenality, I can't beleive I didn't catch that. I just keep telling myself: "Look at how long it took Pat and Linda to read horses..."

So I felt bad about that. But after she calmed down, I drew her to me, and she came! That's when I realized something: When we're at liberty, I wiggle my fingers, instead of combing the rope, and she comes. And when I have the rope in my hand, I comb it, and she doesn't come. But but when I just wiggle my fingers, she comes. So I'm glad I figured that one out!! :-)

So, while she was running again, I sat down, trying to figure things out, and my mom called, said that she twisted her ankle pretty badly. We ended up taking her to the doctor, and now her foot is in a walking boot. This is the third time now that something has happened preventing her from playing with the horses. So I've been busy helping her with that all week. And when I tell her about Brizzee, she smiles. I'm thinking: "She's unconfident, I made her that, that' not FUNNY!"

Last year, before we had a MAJOR BREAKTHROUGH, she was like this, except it was much worse. And then we had our break through, so my mom has a "feeling" that we are about to have another break through. I hope so! :-) Today, it was fun!

I groomed all the horses (saving her for last. lol). First of all, after about five minutes, she came up to me from clear across our pen. FIVE MINUTES, that's it!! Last year she ignored me for HOURS, wouldn't even look at me. I gave her a treat, rubbed on her, and haltered her. She seemed a little Extroverted at first, so I ran. Well...she was feeling froggy. She ran, and then bucked towards me, but she missed...thank goodness. She was just feeling good. I groomed her for a few minutes, and then we did lots of Sideways, and started playing the Circling Game. She is so funny, she'll start off far away from me, and then by the time the full circle is almost done, she's right beside me. Sweet Girl.

She went sideways without the fence for a little bit, and then she walked up on the cement while I was on the ground. It was funny. I stopped, and she didn't stop until I was behind her. I just stood there, and finally she licked, sighed, and backed up until I was at her shoulder. I was SOOO happy!! And that's pretty much all we did....well, we did the Falling Leaf Pattern "in place" for a little while, and that was fun. I was going to back her through the gate, but the gate kept closing, so that didn't work out too well, but oh well.

And we didn't get to record our Level 1 Online on Monday becuase of my mom's foot, and it was REALLY windy. I thought I was going to be blown away. But hopefully sometime this week, or next week we'll record it, course we need to work on our Figure 8. And I didn't take her to the Team Sorting either, but hopefully weekend after this I'll take her. And TWILIGHT COMES OUT ON SATURDAY!!

My mom and I made a deal that if I don't talk about Twilight until after Saturday, she'll rent it, early Saturday morning, and we'll watch it on Saturday. I agreed to the deal immediately, but I didn't realize how hard it would be! I must have talked about Twilight a lot...but it's such a good series! My family thinks I'm weird because I like Vampires (well actually my favorite character is Jacob Black...I like wolves. lol) but if they would just read it, they'd understand. Stephenie Meyer needs to finish Midnight Sun, and then do some more books in the Twilight Series about Renesmee and Jacob....yeah, in case you haven't noticed I'm in a weird mood today. lol.

A friend of ours talked to me last night, asking me when I'm going to get started training horses....I didn't know what to say! I'd like to become a Parelli Professional, and do whatever is involved with that right after I'm on my own (or before then). I'll be 18 in 2 years and about 8/9 months...YIKES! My only plans in life are becoming a Parelli Professional, and having my own ranch...and of course, being a Published Author. I have a certain set of rules of mine:

1. I'm not going to get married, and get tied down.
2. I'm not going to have kids.
3. I am going to accomplish my dreams in life.

If I do accomplish my dreams/goals, I will be the first one in this family too!! My mom had dreams, my sister had dreams, but they both got married, and then had children, and meanless to say, they never got their dream (but I guess they didn't want it bad enough). But I'm going to fight for it, and do whatever it takes to accomplish my dreams, because I want it bad enough. I'm not going to get married and get tied down, and then not do what I want to do out of my life.

And I'm praying for His guidance and strength every night. :-)

Okay, I think I made this long enough. lol.

Savvy On,
~Randa~ & ~Brizzee~