...More about this later...
Okay, it's later. I'm having a lot of trouble reading Brizzee. I've watched the first three DVD'S in the Liberty and Horse Behaviour, I've learned the tactics, and everything else. When I play with Brizzee, I try to figure out whether she is confident, unconfident, what. For a long time now I thought she was Left Brain Intovert, because she's very food oriented, doesn't have much energy, and gets bored easily, and doesn't need to move her feet. And she didn't seem "unconfident".
But the last few times I've played with her, I thought she was being Left Brain and stubborn (she is very stubborn), and she was actually right brain and Unconfident!! It wasn't until her head was high, and she was really braced when I realized it. I feel so bad. Has she been unconfident this whole time, and I've been misreading that? And everytime I do, she becomes more and more unconfident? Ugh!
She doesn't have anything in the Right Brain Introvert........
She doesn't need to move her feet until she really gets unconfident, she's not real panicky. She's like a Left Brain Introvert...but with Unconfidence!
When I played with her last time, she began to get unconfident, so I thought: "Okay, what are the tactics for unconfident horses?" And everything I learned, everything I have been studying, flew out the window. I had no idea what to do. So when she finally licked her lips, came up to me, etc. I gave her a treat, removed her halter, and walked back to the house. Because at this point, I was getting frustrated because I didn't know what to do, I was mad at myself because I didn't realize this sooner, and so many other mixed emotions were going through me.
Even when I just sit and spend Undemanding Time with her, she seems unconfident...thinking back on it.
I was halfway up to the house when it all came "gushing" back! It drives me crazy. I form a plan in my head; "Do Undemanding time, when she's confident do the Friendly Game, etc." And I have all the strategies, tactics, and everything. So then I go get the halter, the toys, and as soon as I start playing with her, EVERYTHING goes out the door, and as soon as I get away from her, it all comes back.
It's starting to drive me crazy! Do I need to take all the pocket guides, the DVD's, and the TV out to the corral so I have strategies with me? This is insane!
So, I spend Undemanding time with her, and she still seems unconfident. But at yet, as soon as I draw her attention from standing in her zone 5, she comes up to me, searched for a treat. She "seems" content being with me. She takes treats, stands still when I rub and groom her, her head is even touching the ground. But then when I sit on the pedastal or stomething, her body gets tense, and as soon as we start playing, she gets tense. I've been grooming her a lot, since she seems relaxed with that, but it's just so annoying. Right now I have all these strategies, and everything, but as soon as I go out there, everything goes out the door.
Has any of this ever happened to any of you before? Does it make me a terrible leader that I've been misreading her all along? But she has EVERYTHING in Left Brain Introvert, and hardly anything else in the other quadrants, except for being tense and unconfident.
So, for the last couple of days I've been trying to figure things out. I want to play with her (but unfurtunately the weather isn't cooperating), but then again I'm afriad to. I'm worried that I'll get out there, start playing with her, mis read her again, not have a strategy, and make the relationship worse! She's such a mystery, and she's my first horse. Last year everything was going really great, and so far this year it's just been...I don't even know what the word is.
And she's kinda in a grouchy mood lately. I don't know. I just wish I could figure something out to keep all the strategies and everything in my head WHILE I'm out there playing with her. Does anyone have ANY suggestions, or has this every happened to anyone else??
Savvy On,
~Randa~ & ~Brizzee~
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