Brain Dead!!

Well, we went to the the Team Sorting today. It was pretty fun. My mom decided to ride Ute in the Team Sorting, and she did REALLY good. If they would've gotten just one more cow out, she would have been in the money, but it's okay, it's fun anyways! Brizzee did really good...as long as we were with Ute. LOL. But that was my fault.

As soon as I got her out this morning, she was prancing around, trotting (no bucking, cro hopping, or any of that stuff, which is really good ;) And she was pawing when I tied her to the trialer to groom her, and she usually doesn't paw, so I started having doubts. But we played a little bit, play stick to me...except she was out away from me, but she stayed even with me, so I guess that counts. And then she wouldn't load. And that was my fault because I was really nervous, my hands, feet, legs, and pretty much my whole body was shaking. I wasn't scare dof her, just being there.

But anyways, I calmed down, and she loaded right up. It's amazing what can happen when you adjust what you do. hehe. So then we were on the way. She did really good when we first got there, paid attention to me, did everything I suggested and/or asked, which was really good.

When I got on, I just rode next to Ute, and I'd leave Ute, and she was okay at first, and then she started fighting, pushing against me, ignoring me trying to bend her until she reached Ute, then she would bend nicely...of course. And the funny thing is, here, she doesn't stay around the horses. She's off doing her own thing. But eventually hopefully she'll be lookign to me more, and not Ute... I HOPE!

So anyways, I realized after we left (I always dwell on what I did, what I could've done differently, etc.) And no wonder she wanted to stay with Ute! I'm brain dead. I watch all the Fluidity dvd's, and I practice it when I walk, sit, whatever I do. I get the "go" energy in my body, and then the "stop" energy. And I practice my bending all the time, but as soon as I get on, everything is gone!

I am brain dead. I have no creativity, nothing to give her to do...no where important to go, and I may remember once or twice to have energy, but it last for about 2.5 seconds before it's gone. And then she stops and I'm like; "Why does she keep stopping!" Well gee, I wonder WHY! I know what I'm doing wrong in the saddle now, but if I go out there tomorrow and ride, I'll do the same thing! How do I overcome this? How do I remember to be fluid, to have ENERGY, and bring my ENERGY down.

I know it's hard for me to keep my feet in the right position because I have a foot problem. When I was a baby they were supposed to break all the my bones from my hips down to my toes, but they didn't, so now I walk like I duck. And when I sit in the saddle, and just drape my legs around my horse, or just let them hang or whatever, the bottom of my feet are sticking out to the side, and I'm kickign her in the flanks! I wasn't even aware of this until my mom said something today. So now I have to keep watching for that. It hurts, but I think...I hope, that it'll start getting easier and more "natural" as we ride more.

I just need to figure out how to keep everything in my mind when I'm riding her, and playing with her on the ground, and think of tasks to do. Course, maybe I have such a brain over load that everything that I go brain dead. I don't know. Does anyone have any suggestions, or has this ever happened to you?

Savvy On,
~Randa~ & ~Brizzee~
Pics tomorrow, hopefully!